Changes

Tomorrow morning, after about an hour of acid level action and jamming out the door, my life begins a new chapter. I will be alone for six hours and twenty minutes, five days a week. This freedom for the low price of sending my babies off to be taught, nurtured, disciplined, attended to by a teacher and about 20 of their counterparts. :(. I remember when there were days I dreamt about such a time in my life...some just during the past three months of summer (we survived). Now that it's here my heart is screaming, hold the phone, please wait, it's all happened too fast. And then there are the nagging questions. Is Hannah too young to be a Kindergartner and at school for so long? Will Laura make friends and be happy and not die over the stinking fcat? Will Cole handle being separated from the majority of his friends who are all in a class together? I didn't imagine the stress of the weight of these questions and my perusing into Florida virtual school, but alas it's true. It's not something we'll jump into lightly, the summer is too fresh on our minds :), but it's defintiely a consideration which I would've never anticipated.

I'm going to miss them so much and worry about them, for them. I keep going back to the fact that I made it through and if I baby them, then what happens when the real world comes knockin..and it will.

But I'm excited for the good things school brings and I'm not so foolish not to be excited for myself and the time I'll have (when I'm not subbing or working at target).

Here's back to school tidbits:

Cole is the one most dreading school. So tonight I said, "Ok, Cole what if I tell you we're pulling you out, you'll be homeschooled, starting tomorrow." He said all disgruntled and torn "I need the playground and my friends here and I'm good". I said, "Your friends will be at school." He replied, "I need something bad to happen to the school." :) Always has a plan that guy.

Laura has been a quiet ball of nerves, she's expressed her anxieties over random things and pretty much internalizes everything and then explodes over the little stuff, but once she's done exploding for a little bit she's good. She should be good for a while now. :) She said on the way to church this morning, "I don't want to be the middle child." She couldn't cite me an example of how this a bad thing, she just knows it is. I do rely on her a lot and am so appreciative of her help. She's the child I'm having the hardest time sending. :(

Tonight Hannah asks me for the third time to lay down with her, she'd been pinging off the walls for much of the evening. As I lay down with her, again (cause tomorrow's the first day of school and I'm a sucker) she says, "This time Mommy, lay down with me for a long time" I say " I'll lay down with you for a little time". Pause "Mommy, a little time is not even a word".

Here's a pic of Cole and Laura meeting Hannah when she was born, the day before Cole started Kindergarten. Time has flown and the song is true.."you're I gonna miss this".

And we're

Anya was here for the first day, loved having her.



trying to hop back into the blogging thang! I would put a little synopsis in one post, but the pics really tick me off, it really should be easier.

So here goes :)

School started...
and all of my kids are in school, Hannah is going to prek4 at the same school Cole and Laura went to and she likes it. The first few days, just before dropping her off I would feel a ton of guilt for sending my baby to school and then a huge sigh of freedom as I was pulling out of the parking lot.

Such a weird thing to have spent nine years everyday with someone calling me mommy 50 times a day (although I'm sure that quota is still met, just more condensed). I often go back and forth on the home schooling/sending to school thing. I miss them, I would love to somehow give them the best of both worlds, but I know for now this is the best way for us. We'll definitely revisit the situation for middle school (aka as scary spice).

So far we love our teachers. Ya never know what you're gonna get in a teacher and this year is pretty good, nobody can be perfect. Cole's teacher this year might be close to it. Laura's teacher is on her game, I was sitting the class today, playing school (stapling papers) and she had the kids broken up into groups and had three different groups come to her and she explained the same thing to each group, I would have no hair left. I swear next to mother's, teachers have to have the toughest jobs. They barely get to go to potty, forget about going to lunch! I appreciate them! So school is going pretty good...moving on.

Lists

Laura was very excited about doing school lunch shopping with me. She made lists three different times because of misplacement, each had check boxes and the desires of lunch munchies for her and Cole. She wanted just the two of us to go shopping and take care of this important responsibility.

Well yesterday was the day, cause ya know when else at this point? We had to drop something off at the church and decided to drop Cole off as well, kept Hannah, logistics just didn't pan out for a mommy/Laura shop. So we're close to a Publix (campus Publix) and I ask Laura if she wants to go to the Publix closest to us or closest to home.

I knew she'd pick closest to us, but I like change and yes I considered that FSU students were back in town, but I brushed it off.

We go in and we are in the thick of it....moms, dads, students. When I see the parents bringing their kids to school I think it's so sweet and it was, we just weren't in the mix. We were the only group with anyone under the age of 17. It was tight and Hannah's singing may have annoyed a few. Laura's basket may have hit a few people, her taking the time to check her list may have tried someone's patience.

I watched at one point as Laura checked her list, and I could see behind her a freshman and mom discussing spices. I thought of the different stage they are at in their lives and how very far away it seems and reminded myself not to rush it.

I'll be sending my babies off for a few hours tomorrow that I have trepidations about and those moms are dropping their babies off for months....with thousands of other interesting, differing, whateverelsing, very young adults.

I'll wait for that thanks.

Then we come to the end and I see another odd man (couple) out. Representin' the older generation is an elderly man and he is pulling the cart with and even more elderly gentleman who's shuffling his feet, having trouble breathing. And it seems to me that the son is helping his father shop for his groceries, (probably not for school lunch munchies). It was sweet and made me think.

I have bittersweet emotions about tomorrow's freedom for my child, I have larger issues with someday leaving her at a university/world's door and visions of further down the road, when a time comes, where Laura is taking me shopping and a hope that she will slow down for me to check my list.

School and stuff

Laura's started kindergarten and is really good at school and let's it all out while at home. She loves packing lunch, the playground and being picked up through the drive thru :).

Cole's in 2nd grade, big boy. He wasn't excited about school, but the first day he spent fifteen minutes, literally, telling the first part of the box car kids. He's given us a summary everyday. The teacher has a store wherein the kids can earn "money" and buy or save when the store is open on Fridays. The child is in heaven. If only he were in class with his kindergarten crush I wouldn't know what to do with him so probably best that's not the case. He thought he was going to hate the back playground and he loves it. I'm so glad. The mornings are already a challenge, shoes crisis, breakfast crisis, snack crisis - but we're not off to a horrible start.

I do miss the kids but have enjoyed time with Hannah. I also enjoy lunches alone while Hannah naps. I know there will come a day where I will have too much time on my hands, alas the break is nice. Like I tell my kids there are advantages and disadvantages to everything. I usually say that when Hannah's giving them trouble.

I have found teaching my kids has taught that good one and another I really like is when someone has hit someone for someone saying something mean..I tell them
You can't choose what somene does to you, but you can always choose how you react to it, you can only control yourself. Why is this so hard to remember as adults? We're only human I suppose. Ah....life!

Summer school

So we started our home summer school last week. On the first day the kids were super excited, second, somewhat excited and then it kind of went down hill from there, but the important thing is we're still going. This past week Cole had a hard time joining us but he did after a couple of threats. So here's what we did....

I already knew that we would do devotional and exercise as we had started that before school officially begain. So Laura started the idea of getting in our recliner and driving to each venue..."church", gym, school. If Laura wasnt' so into the school thing I don't know if it would've lasted as long as it has. So we sing a couple of good morning songs, say the day, date and what they think the weather is going to be that day. We then read a story. Then we talk about our topic of the week. The first week was our senses, the first day was touch and I had them feel into a bag and tell me what was in it, and we went along like that each day with different senses. Then they're given their worksheets and it's free time until after lunch where I would read a chapter book out loud (this didn't last too long, we finished one book, but have yet to start another one, we will though) and we would do a craft later in the day. I topic this past week was ....surprice, United States. I've got to get on next week's!

so all told we spend a couple of hours working together and the rest was pretty much normal. I really think it helped give structure to our day and even when the kids didn't like it they liked it in the end.

Hannah is adorable doing the exercises and she's pretty good at counting to 10 and saying her abc's. She doesn't like "circle time" though, but she's getting there.

The week we start back at swimming lessons twice a week, so it'll change our school up a little bit. But so far so good.